Drunk as Lords
Inflation Proof Bourbon
The consumer price index will, well, it will drive you to drink is what it will do. To that end the 4717 offers three inflation-proof bourbons. Or to be more precise, speculation proof bourbons – the price of corn is just going to do what it’s going to do. A $80 bottle of Pappy jumping to $500, then $1,200 is not a function of pricier inputs – it’s bourbon as a meme-stock.
None of these are collector bottles, just three bourbons that are not going to jump in value unless it’s tied to an epic story involving hunting dogs and the new sales assistant. None of these are in the premium space either – but now that gasoline, steak and bread are in that space, it’s getting crowded. None of these are rot-gut either. The only reason to drink that is to get plowed, and doing that more than semi-regularly requires a savage re-assessment of your life choices. This is not the place for all that. All are all solid, drinkable bourbons worth a try in these grim days. To wit:
Old Forester: The standard expression, the stuff your dad and grandfather drank, will set you back $21.99. Don’t sneer either, these are the guys that built your world so raise a glass to them. The Signature expression will set you back $26.99 –it’s a little bigger, rounder and smooth. For fans of the Old Forester birthday bourbons, the signature expression comes from the same batch but is pulled a little earlier. And timing does matter, with this sort of thing. With the higher end expression generally around $60, this is a significant discount. In the 4717’s Entirely Scientific Tasting Lab the team consensus is that you get about 85% the whiskey for about half the price.
McAfee’s Benchmark Old No. 8: Just call it Benchmark, a lower shelf expression from Buffalo Trace Distillers –who absolutely know how to make bourbon. For its price point, a suspiciously low $10.99 in Memphis prices, Benchmark is smoother you’d expect. It has got a hint of spice and vanilla, but it’s on the lighter side. Our man in Huntsville declared it “a great mixing bourbon” if you are a closet bartender and can’t pass up the craft cocktail.
Very Old Barton: Chances are you missed this resident of the bottom shelf unless you bent down to polish the snaffle on your slides. At $9.99 the bottom shelf does not always translate to bottom of the barrel (although, that is the safe bet). In the case of Very Old Barton, it’s the opposite. This bourbon regularly wins and places in blind tastings and has gathered a shelf of awards itself. The reason is probably because bourbon enthusiasts have indulged in the usual douchebaggery that goes along with rising prices and dismissed the bottle on price alone.
That being said, you might want to pour it into a decanter – and use the wedding crystal if the wife hasn’t decided to leave you yet. Those price points are liable to make you defensive.